Bamboozled
there is honestly nothing more gorgeously tacky than bowling alley carpet
Don’t even talk to me if all of your clothes aren’t made out of bowling alley carpet
Elizabethan Peasant 1: Look yonder! Someone has writ upon that ceiling that thou art most easily gulled!
Elizabethan Peasant 2: More fool they, for I cannot read.
Elizabethan Peasant 1: *sighing, lowers his visage unto his palm*
Elizabethan Peasant 1: Lo, hast thou learned to read?
Elizabethan Peasant 2: Verily, and to compose as well.
Elizabethan Peasant 1: With haste, then, how is the word “i cup” composed?
Elizabethan Peasant 1: what ho, I know a sporting jest! What art thou when thou art a peasant and art occupied in a privy?
Elizabethan Peasant 2: I wist not, but certain am I that thou shalt tell me speedily.
Elizabethan Peasant 1: Most verily, thou art a peon.
Elizabethan Child: Father, I have not yet broken fast and am filled with pangs of hunger.
Elizabethan Father: Hail, Filled With Pangs Of Hunger! Mine own name is Wybert.
me: i really need to talk this out with someone
my anxiety: ur coming off needy. isolate urself and handle it. all u need is U!
Oh, nonsense. This is nothing compared to the twig of ‘93.
When I was a kid I laughed at this, but now as an adult who works in the public, I can assure you people are exactly like this.








